Saturday 3 August 2013

The Blessing of DIS-ILLUSION-MENT: Seeing the contrast and choosing Joy

I've been talking to AK while he was writing part 1 of this article and I was thrilled to see it's final form.  Brilliant Job darlin!!

Strangely enough, many of us that have been working together so closely for the past 7 or 8 months have similar backgrounds and upbringings.  Bob and I were both brought up in the same church, and our personal lives and stories of self discovery are so similar- in timing and content- that we are like two peas in a pod, lol. Freakishly so in fact.  AK's story is also so very similar that it boggles the mind and we have had many many deep conversations on the topic of religion- of all shapes and sizes- and the mythos of the bible and other religious books.

For many years after leaving the religion of my childhood and parentage, I wandered the world questioning and searching.  I studied more religions and religious texts than I can remember at this point, searching for the answers that always seemed to elude me. Before I truly began my quest I even restudied the religion of my childhood- returning to my roots to start from the beginning- to discern between what I believed, vs what was brainwashed into me during my formative years.  I very quickly saw through the rhetoric and empty rules and dogma to see that it was empty of meaning for me- it answered not a single one of my inner questions. Having addressed that point, which I felt was an important first step on my path, I was then free to expand my search for inner enlightenment to the four corners of the Globe.  I met so many people who shared my background- who'd made the same jumps that I had and had taken their own path to discovery. I met many many people who had been brought up in the same church I had been, who had left, as I had, to find the real "truth".... any tiny remaining grains of doubt that I had quickly blew away as I discussed with them their own stories and heard what their experiences from within the church brought them- the ever changing rules, the hidden agendas, the hiding away of anything that could possibly besmirch the name of the church.....

My journey down the rabbit hole only strengthened my belief that no religion can lead to enlightenment or true spirituality.  The deeper I went, the more I saw organized religion for what it truly is: Control of the Masses and the separation of people- not only from each other, but from their Creator/Source/God.  When ANY person tells you that only THEY can speak for god, or only THEY can interpret the purported "word of god", or that you can only reach god through THEIR teachings..... ummmmmm no- not for me, thanx.

As the rabbit hole got deeper and deeper and more dark and convoluted, I thrust aside all aspects of "spirituality" as I couldn't "trust" any persons opinion and had little time to really focus on my inner guidance.  It wasn't until I was smacked in the face by my higher self that I finally took the blinders off and began to look within and without and learned to follow the energetic trail to what resonated within ME.

I could type for ages and pages about THAT journey, but it isn't the point.  AK's final paragraph holds the key to my thoughts for today:

"Talking with others who are experiencing the same thing is so helpful. You are not alone. The responses vary, and you will see a lot of variety of response to the revelations of truth that are coming to your attention the coming days.  DIS-ILLUSION-MENT is a blessing.  It can be painful and disorienting or joyful and exciting.  Depends on how you want to view it."
 For many years, decades in fact, I held my past in a place of anger. It was a smouldering ember of resentment- for the things and experiences that I lost during my childhood, and for the "religiously" driven separation, judgement and thinly veiled condemnation that I felt continuously bombarded with from moment I'd left the church.  It wasn't until just this year that I had a startling revelation about my past, and my resentments which enabled me to completely let go of them:

1- my resentment was my own, no one else's. I could allow it to burn me up, blame it for my failures, and never move beyond it- thereby letting it define WHO I am, and allowing that pain to continue.  Or.... I could release that anger and douse the embers of resentment and accept that I AM who I AM. That I am creating my reality in the NOW.

2- my past held up the perfect contrast to get to where I am today.  I would not be here if it hadn't been for those contrasts that showed me what I do not believe, that showed me who I do not want to be, that showed me that through darkness there IS light. All those people who held up that contrast.... I love them now more than ever before, because now I can see that they were there in my life at the perfect moments to hold that contrast so that I could find my way HERE.

So, when you wake from that Dis-illusion-ment you have a choice: look at it with pain and anger and regret, or you can look at it with joy and excitement and love.

I choose the JOY and EXCITEMENT and LOVE. I KNOW who I BE.  I DO what I DO.  In love and in Joy and in excitement... I DO.



Simulacra and Simulation book from the movie Matrix

by American Kabuki

It was 30 below in St. Paul the dark night Rodney rang me.  "Hey man, you gotta see this movie, I'm coming over!"  He didn't say why he wanted me to see it, drove all the way from Eden Prairie to St Paul just to get me.  Rodney liked to do things just to watch my reactions.  He drove me out to a cineplex in Burnsville MN. The roads were icy and cold and I remember crossing that arched suspension bridge on I-35 West going over the Mississippi out of the Twin Cities and wondering if the tires would steer straight with all the ice.  I really didn't want to go off the edge in the Mississippi that night.   The parking lot of the cineplex had at least 2 inches of ice on it. It was tough to walk without falling and busting my ass. Not a night I will ever forget.  "This better be worth it Rodney!"  "Oh man you will like this one!" he smiled and laughed.

The movie was the Matrix, and it appeared to be a movie about a hacker.  Started out that way too, until Neo took the painful red pill of facing reality for the first time, and then the movie took a sudden and much unexpected turn.

I should have known what was coming with the knock on the door. Neo pulled out the disk for his data hungry customer and his party friends  from the hollowed out book Simulacrum and Simulation, by Jean Baudrillard.
Simulacrum (pluralsimulacra), from Latinsimulacrum which means "likeness, similarity",[1] was first recorded in the English language in the late 16th century, used to describe a representation, such as a statue or a painting, especially of a god. By the late 19th century, it had gathered a secondary association of inferiority: an image without the substance or qualities of the original.
Neo discovered after taking the red pill that his world was nothing like he thought it was. Not his job, not his employer, not even his own makeup and being.  He was a slave and farmed for the energy his and many millions of others created.  And since the body cannot exist for long without the mind, his mind was fed an illusion so that his energy could be harvested without resistance.

The movie haunted me.  There was a basic truth in it. And it ached like some really awful heretical truth nobody wanted to talk about. Everyone felt it.  We are farmed.  I learned this year, like the Matrix,  it was about the extraction of energy.  Human energy. Not just my tax dollars or paycheck. The method is not a tower of vats of KY Jelly lit by red LEDs with comatose humans on neoprene tubes.  The method is a tower of grey pin stripped suited bankers around the planet running the most sophisticated energy extraction system the world has ever seen.  It is also automated, and it is full of AI programs!

I took for granted from my youth America was dominant in the world and was indoctrinated into the belief that we had superior morals and higher ideals.  That was why we succeeded while India and China starved. Or so the propaganda went.  We were told in the 1960s about how mean and nasty Russians made women work and leave their kids in government run day schools.  We all had stay-at-home moms and didn't fancy them not being there when we got home from schools.  We were told how they spied on their people and jailed them for no reason, torturing enemies foreign and domestic.  We were taught to duck and cover under our desks in case a nuclear bomb hit. Like that would make any difference?

Many decades have passed and almost all women must work in America, whether they have kids or not, just to make ends meet.   A car that cost $4000 in the 1960s now costs $35,000.  We learned our government tortures and they call it "enhanced interrogation" as do the police sometimes.  Our once mighty financial status, grown through leased gold from the Chinese Royal families and the circumstances of having won World War II has been dissipated by our own greedy shorted sighted Corporations looking for the cheapest labor.  The prosperity has gone back to the Chinese. We emerged unchallenged into in the 1940s and the rest of the world was in shatters, now we are in shatters and the rest of the world is moving on.

I had been anesthetized to the illusion I lived in by my religious upbringing. I believed that all evil came from the devil and his minions. And from the looks of things he was winning and God was losing.  Most religions make a lot of money off that fallacy. My religion was the only true cure specially delivered to my faiths very prophet for the end time. That cut and dried, black and white binary view of things was clean and simple and didn't require much thought. We had a pigeon in hole for every problem on earth. And we thought we had the cure, some half cocked idea of a theocracy which was just another coercive form of religious tyranny that has since played itself out in Iran, Afghanistan and half dozen other countries much to the horror of the occupants.  God bless the young Scottish woman in Scotland that pointed that out to me when I was working in England.

I discovered in 1994, that my religion was every bit a part of crazy world that surrounded it, full of men ready to betray their friends for a church pension, only to be denied their pension by the men who held that over their heads.  In some respects the religion of my youth was wackier than the world it pretended it was separate from.   We were taught that all authority was God given, especially in the church.  Rebellion to church or state was the very act of the devil.  How very lucky for the state!  The religion bred a generation of people who all too willingly suffered abuse and did nothing about it.  "God will changes this" was the common refrain, but they never could see themselves as being the Eternal Essence from God manifested in human form to bring the needed changes.  At least "the world" lived in the present, we lived for the future and not the present. We lived for promises that could never be delivered based on premises that were never true for very large amounts of money we gave in the present.

I knew the explanations I had no longer worked. I couldn't carve up and dice humanity into simple terms like good and evil, or God and the Devil as it is often externalized as if either set of behaviors is somehow not in our nature, it seemed that very dichotomy and the belief in the separation was also part of the control, and for someone somewhere all that mattered was that people be divided and fighting one another in the name of God, religion, political party, or gender or sexual politics. Religions talk about love but show very little of it to those who don't believe their dogma.

Governments talk about justice but in practice you only get the justice you can afford.  Free enterprise is lauded as the path to financial independence but the very largest companies you see very little of it that isn't tied to government contracts, subsidies, or tax credits.   Playing with stacked deck is considered just good business.

Create a label, cut and paste on your favorite enemy.  Everyone seemed to have a light and dark side, and this seemed to be intrinsic to the human experience. Did we choose to experience all this and the situation was some contrived simulacra of reality run by parties unknown? The Matrix?   Or a vast long ago conceived Experiment? Even in the darkness of humanity there is undeniably great acts of light and love.

The growth of knowledge of what IS has grown exponentially since 2000. It will continue to grow until it is all known and made plain in all realms of existence.   Those of us looking forward to disclosure in finance, ETs, and all the corruption in government and business, have long anticipated it.  Even prayed for it.  Sought it with all our being. And some have even died or we jailed exposing it.

Now its happening so fast and so out in the open and not even the main stream press can cover it up.
CNN today quite openly said the CIA was running guns to Syrian rebels out of Benghazi and sending arms via networks in Turkey. This has been rumored for months, but now its on mainstream TV news.  That opens up an area of public discussion that really needs the disinfectant of sunshine.

Truth will set you free, but first it will really piss you off!  The log jam of lies is breaking loose and river of truth is beginning to flow, many will find themselves in great disillusionment. Thoughts of "how could I be so blind" or "how could I be so stupid" will cross your mind.  Be gentle with yourself, you were in an illusion for the experience of it, and quite possibly you came here specifically to be a part of ending it.  So no need to beat yourself up, billions of others are in the same shoes.

Consider the word, DIS-ILLUSION-MENT.  Removed from the illusion. Removed from the Simulacra, the simulation...  But it can be a jarring experience. It can leave you stunned.  I have seen people become completely disoriented when they discovered their religion was nothing like they were told and they were lied to by their leaders.  Most, after a time, went on to productive lives, some pretended nothing happened and continued on. A few had some really bizarre symptoms and extremes of behavior.  Talking with others who are experiencing the same thing is so helpful. You are not alone. The responses vary, and you will see a lot of variety of response to the revelations of truth that are coming to your attention the coming days.  DIS-ILLUSION-MENT is a blessing.  It can be painful and disorienting or joyful and exciting.  Depends on how you want to view it. Truth is the fertile soil for healthy BEing and DOing.  Lies were told to keep you from BEing and DOing. The time has come for Truth.  Time to BE Eternal Essence inbodied and DO.

Stay in Joy and may your journey be smooth.


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